Top 3 ways to be gently nudged awake

Posted by anthonykuo , May, 2009 @ 10:05 am

1. To the sun gently warming up your room.
peaceful progression wake up clock

But if it’s cloudy all day long, or if the sun simply doesn’t reach your room in the morning, the Peaceful Progression Wake Up Clock, found at Hammacher Schlemmer, has a light that gradually dims for 30 minutes when you go to bed, then slowly brightens starting 30 minutes before your alarm time. This actually has some scientific merit — the presence or absence of light helps regulate your circadian cycles. From my own personal experience, I know that waking up with the sun in my eyes, although it sometimes happens before I want it to, is an excellent way to start my day.

2. By your butler, with coffee, eggs, bacon, a roll, the morning news, and a change of clothes.
infallibly polite alarm clock
Yes, I’m talking about Reginald Jeeves, “politely affirming the beginning of a new day.” In case you don’t have a butler of your own, you can always have the Infallibly Polite Speaking Alarm, with its 126 polite remarks softly spoken to you in the morning including, “The world has been very anxious to hear from for the last eight hours. Shall I inform the news agencies that you are about to rise, sir?” and, “I am delighted you have survived another night. If you will allow a personal note, sir, may I add my own small congratulations to the roar of the world’s approval? … Thank you, sir.”

If you haven’t been awoken by the dry wit, more traditional beeps will ensue, which you can pause, but with yet another witty response from the persistent butler. This clock is also at Hammacher Schlemmer (what a name), but for whatever reason, is $30 cheaper at ThinkGeek.

3. By the shock of being shaken awake by an earthquake, and semi-deafened by a jackhammer next to your ear.
sonic bomb alarm clock
No, neither gentle, nor a nudge. This device is not for the faint of heart. Rather, it’s for the incorrigible roommate who insists on hitting the snooze button for two hours. Why not sleep soundly the whole time, if they’re going to stay in bed? In order to properly rouse them, as miserable as it may make them, I recommend the Sonic Bomb Alarm Clock, which comes with a 113 decibel alarm and bedshakers, which you slip under the mattress. For reference, a jackhammer is about 100 decibels. Hint: place the alarm across the room so they can’t simply reach over to hit the snooze button. If you or your roommate somehow sleep through this, well, then I declare this a hopeless case. Found at ThinkGeek.